Sainsbury’s are doing away with the confusion of multiple labels describing products as ‘organic’ or ‘fair-trade’ and instead will be re-branding these foodstuffs as part of their new ‘Gullible range.’
‘Our research shows that people are prepared to pay a little bit more for products that are ethically or environmentally sound’ said a Sainsbury’s spokesman. ‘Now with the Gullible Range, they can see at a glance why they are having to pay that little bit more.’
A quick tour of the shelves reveals a wide choice of products. While conventional large round red tomatoes are still selling at around £2.50 a kilo, small yellow tomatoes cost around twice as much. Crisps that are flavoured with ‘sea salt and cider vinegar’ are also included in the Gullible Range, as are bottles of olive oil with old leaves still inside.
One happy shopper spent nearly twice as much as usual by only buying products from the Gullible Range. ‘These organic lettuces are produced without the use of pesticides,’ said mother of two Davina Sutton; ‘you’d obviously want to pay a bit more for a lettuce with flies and slugs on it.’
As she proceeded to the checkout it was explained to Ms Sutton that all the extra profits from the new Gullible Range were given over to the African farm workers who produced the goods.
She then traded in seven thousand Sainsbury’s vouchers that she’d collected from her children’s primary school to claim the special ‘Fitness for Kids’ free tennis ball.