Gillette and North Korea combine to produce ‘Nuclear Razor’

In a move that has shocked the diplomatic and business communities, Gillette have revealed a secret partnership with North Korea to produce the latest in shaving innovation; the ‘Gillette Fission.’

Nuclear razor The new razor features an unprecedented ten blades, five lubrastrips, and a small nuclear reactor. Shavers are urged to also purchase a disposable radiation-proof suit which is needed to protect the shaver against the thermo-nuclear reactor which vibrates the 10 blades, agitating the throat-skin and getting the blades just that little bit closer to the skin than the previous model.

Gillette chief executive Don Page, commented: ‘We always knew that nuclear power was the next step in the evolution of the razor blade but costs have always been prohibitive. North Korea’s successful nuclear test and willingness to sell cheaply to any international bidder convinced us that the time was right.’

kim jong il In an ironic twist, Kim Jong-il, North Korea’s charismatic, smooth-chinned leader is believed to have only given the go ahead to the partnership after receiving assurances from the Gillette corporation that they would teach him how to grow facial hair.