Descendents of slave trade apologise for rap

Blair apology Tony Blair’s apology for Britain’s involvement in the slave trade brought a swift response today from Britain’s Afro-Caribbean community who responded with a full apology for the suffering endured as a result of rap music.

‘We cannot continue to ignore the incalculable misery has been caused by people having to listen to rap music, a genre which we must acknowledge originated within the black community’ said Kofi Owusu the editor of Black Nation Quarterly. ‘Millions of Britons; black and white have had to endure this shouty tuneless nonsense and it is time that black people acknowledged their cultural culpability.’

Rap star With both sides of Britain’s racial divide doing their utmost to appear conciliatory in the run up to the bicentenary of the abolition of slavery, the apologies went back and forth throughout the day. Tony Blair also apologised for the vaguely offensive 1970s sit-com ‘Love Thy Neighbour’ and the fact that the black labrador in The Dam Busters is called ‘Nigger’. The head of the Commission for Racial Equality then issued a statement saying that the annoying fashion in which trousers were far too baggy and hung down around the wearers’ crotch also originated in the black community and for this he expressed ‘very sincere regret’. 10 Downing Street issued a further statement saying sorry for the enamel golliwog badges you used to get with Robertson’s jam, for the orginal words of ‘Eeny-Meeny-Miny-Mo’ and for Phil Collin’s cover version of ‘You Can’t Hurry Love’.