Britney’s hair to release solo single

Britney Spears’s blonde hair has reacted to the big split with the announcement that it is going to release a single without its former partner.

Britney and her long blonde hair have previously proved an irresistible duo, selling more than 60 million albums since their pop debut in 1998. However opinion has always been divided as to who had the real star quality – Britney or the hair. Carl Diamond-Ray, the hair’s new manager says it was only the long blonde locks that made Britney so attractive to millions of young girls and single men, and that those fans will stay loyal. But a spokesman for Britney Spears’ record company insist that their singer is a huge talent, with or without the trademark hairstyle and that she will soon return to the top of the charts.

However many music critics agree that in terms of pure talent, there is not much to choose between the two of them. Although the hair cannot technically sing or play an instrument, the marketing guys at EMI records say that with modern recording technology this is not necessarily an impediment to a successful solo career.

As fans gathered at impromptu ‘shorn hair vigils’ all over America, they were conflicted at the news that the Britney/blonde hair split was deepening; ‘Without the hair Britney is nothing. But the hair looks kinda creepy just on it’s own.’ said one fan. ‘I hope that they will get back together for the sake of the fans’.