The troubled Ford Motor Company this week unveiled the new ‘Ford Coco’ – the long-awaited comedy car aimed at the lucrative clown market.
Ford are reported to be pinning all their hopes on this new model, aiming to become the brand leader in mid-range vehicles that backfire and then fall apart as they drive round and round in little circles. After years in the design stage and endless boardroom battles that saw Ford executives getting custard pies in the face, the clown car was finally unveiled at the Birmingham Motor Show. There were gasps and applause, but unfortunately very little laughter. ‘The car is fine,’ said Mike Peters of What Car; ‘But it hasn’t overcome that fundamental design problem of all previous clown cars; it just isn’t very funny.’
The specially hired clown drivers were keen to point out the many exciting new features; such as windscreen-washers aimed at the driver, the loud, old-fashioned ‘parp-parp’ horn and an emergency bucket of confetti to throw over fellow clowns. The official voice over chuckled that ‘The Ford Coco is a five-door, no hang on; four-door! No, now only two-door, mid-range family vehicle that can do 0 – 3 mph in about four minutes!’ And then one of the clowns pretended to cry when the steering wheel came off in his hand. But by this time the straight-faced crowd had drifted off to look at other exhibits.
The designer of the Ford Coco was said to be inconsolable at the reaction. But he did finally manage one big laugh from the crowd, when he drove away from the Exhibition Centre in a Nissan Sunny.