Kevin Smith and Michelle Jones have set a new world record for ignoring each other at work despite working in close proximity to each other. The couple have had an uncomfortable working relationship since a brief but passionate encounter at the office Christmas party back in mid-December.
IT technician Kevin explained ‘I came in as a temp before Christmas, I was kind of attracted to Michelle but not that much. We flirted a bit before a drunken snog and a grope at the Christmas party. To be honest she is no great shakes… maybe it was the older woman thing that got me. I thought that the work was due to end at year end anyway but then I was offered a year’s contract on good money.’
Divorced mother-of-two Michelle explained that it was she who was feeling the most guilty. ‘He’s a bit geeky really, a little creepy looking. He came to fix the computers in my department and there were a few pathetic double entendres exchanged about floppy and hard disks. I said he could put in his memory stick as long as he didn’t have a virus and after a few drinks I thought ‘what the hell?’
Since then there have been countless awkward moments when they have been forced to share a lift, hold open doors for one another or both made a cup of coffee, pretending not to notice that the other was in the tiny office kitchen. After-works drinks have been avoided in case they were forced to sit next to one another, and on one occasion they found themselves locked between the inner and outer door for seven minutes at the end of the day, during which time they both made separate calls to people to come and rescue them.
Michelle is now warning others against the dangers of office relationships and the impact it can have on work, ‘To be honest I have had a problem with a virus on my computer for a month or so but there’s no way I’m asking Kevin about it. I can’t ask his boss either as we had sex in the disabled toilets the Christmas party before.’