British men over 55 were up in arms today following an announcement by the Ministry of Culture that using the phrase ‘The Grauniad’ to describe the newspaper The Guardian was ‘not funny anymore.’
In an unprecedented announcement, Culture Secretary Tessa Jowell released a statement saying:
‘The paper hardly ever has a misprint anymore. Not that it ever had that many anyway. And even if it did, referring to it by calling it The Grauniad stopped being funny round about 1972.’ Planned legislation suggests that there could be a £2000 fine for any man or women using this term (although government research suggests that no woman has ever said it).
John McBride, 58, of Stoke-on-Trent commented: ‘It’s a disgrace. I’ve been calling it The Grauniad for thirty years. My newsagent expects it. Admittedly he doesn’t laugh anymore but then I always put that down to his being from Bangladesh.’ Future bans being proposed following this ruling include anyone saying ‘Scuse I’ instead of ‘excuse me’, or any use, in any context, of the phrase ‘Easy tiger.’
A leader for The Guardian commented: ‘Everyone here agrees that it was high time this joke was laid to rset.’