NewsBiscuit

An American oil magnate has spent millions on a big name British soccer club despite no knowledge of the European game. Charles Winthrop, a Texan billionaire, has just completed a deal worth £120 million to purchase the name, the team and all assets of London Utd FC.

‘I didn’t really know too much about soccer until Galaxy signed Beckham,’ he explained. ‘But I figured that there were big bucks to be made by buying up a major club and taking them back to the States to take on Galaxy and the others in the Major League. What better team to choose than London United?’

However, a slightly alarmed FA spokesman said, ‘We only began listing London Utd FC under the Middlesex Youth FA last month, they’re not yet in a league and as far as we know they play on a recreation ground in Harrow. It’s clearly an ironic name. Apparently their top striker is called Barry Wiggins and he’s 14 and a half.’

A publicity picture of Mr Winthrop prominently features the New Wembley Stadium in the background but was taken at London Utd’s makeshift pitch. The scale of the vast stadium is clearly put into perspective against the jumpers that were being used for goalposts at the time.

London Utd’s players are looking forward to playing against some soccer superstars. ‘But we haven’t got any proper boots yet’ said Barry Wiggins, ‘So Beckham and that will have to wear their school shoes too, to make it fair.’

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Posted: Jul 1st, 2007 by NewsBiscuit