NewsBiscuit

A Member of European Parliament Eric Harvey has tearfully confessed to being caught up in a scam that could have seen Nigeria gaining entry to the European Union. The MEP revealed he was initially contacted by a young Nigerian man in trouble, saying, ‘it was so sad, the son and daughter of a disposed military chief needed money to release millions of secretly held funds so they could escape persecution. The bonus was that they would give me a slice of the pie too. It was a win-win… obviously I was concerned about their well-being, not the money.’

After exchanging several emails a Nigerian man, known only as Stanley, collected a ‘legal expenses fee’ of twenty thousand euro in cash from Mr Harvey, in his office in Strasbourg. Whilst he was there he became very interested in Eric’s role in the EU’s finance committee, asking lots of detailed questions.

The next day Mr Harvey received an email from a yahoo account claiming to be from the Nigerian President Umaru Yar’Adua . It claimed that Nigeria was being picked on by other African countries and OPEC member states, felt an affinity towards European cultural and business values, and that its ambition was to become a full member of the European Union. The email then made a remarkable revelation that Nigeria had 700 billion dollars in cash reserves that it wished to transfer to the EU as quickly as possible. All that was needed from Europe was a small fee of about 6 billion dollars to cover administration costs. Showing evidence of their commitment it gave the number of an account in the Cayman Islands where the money was being held.

‘I couldn’t believe my luck’ said Mr Harvey, ‘coming so soon after my own good fortune. What a deal for Europe. I saw my name up in lights and a big promotion on the cards. I rushed round a few other committee members and made them sign their name claiming it was a petition to stop greenhouse gases, but in fact it was an authorization form to transfer the funds.’ Initially other MEPs and ministers congratulated Eric on his coup, however the ruse soon came to light when Government ministers in Nigeria were bemused to be contacted by a delegation from Brussels offering a welcome and checking when the balance of the seven hundred billion was due.

Eric Harvey was remorseful but claimed he felt he was acting in Europe’s best interests at the time, ‘the worst thing is that Stanley seems to have forgotten to transfer through the three million he promised me too, how unlucky is that?’

Team Biscuit

Posted: Aug 9th, 2007 by robd