NewsBiscuit

A review of the gambling laws is to include the decriminalization of Russian Roulette the Culture Secretary has announced.
With the success of the National Lottery, the growth in internet poker, and calls for super casinos, pressure has been growing for more ‘high-stakes’ gambling, where the player really stands to lose something.

‘Sure gamblers can often lose their house and their job, but that can take ages. Now players can win or lose instantly – and there is real excitement for those taking part. Russian Roulette has historically had a bad reputation, but we want to get away from the water-filled bamboo cage image of the past, and move towards the idea of the socially inclusive, exciting pass time that it is,’said a spokesman for the game’s promoters, quickly adding in a quiet disclaimer voice; ‘Players-must-be-sixteen-or-over-participants-may-die-horribly-of-a-gun-wound-to-the-head.’

The siting of the proposed ‘gaming areas’ has drawn criticism, with South East London, Moss Side and Toxteth being the first to get licences. But Culture secretary James Purnell has denied that this is yet another tax on the greedy and terminally stupid however. ‘The Government and the National Lottery are simply offering the chance for people from these areas a way out, to be all they can be. Good luck, and remember, it might not be you!’

Raccoon

Posted: Oct 28th, 2007 by NewsBiscuit