NewsBiscuit

Israel was being comforted by friends last night after the rest of the Middle East appeared to have forgotten its Sixtieth Anniversary. ‘It’s like they just don’t care’ said Israel. ‘This was a special one and we were hoping that for one year they could remember and get it right without being prompted. We’d been dropping hints all week, but you know, sometimes I think they seem to barely recognize we even exist.’

‘That’s so not true’ said Jordan. ‘May 14th 1948 was a very special day for us too… Like most young families we found ourselves moving out of our homes into something much smaller. And we have seen a lot of Israel down the years. Usually when they come into our garden to move the fence in a bit further.’

Very late in the day, Egypt managed a small bunch of flowers that they picked up from the all-night garage but it couldn’t make up for Israel’s disappointment; ‘They ought to make a bit more effort,’ they said, ‘We wouldn’t want any ill-will developing in the area.’ In their defence, the neighbours said they had always made an attempt to remember other special days; one year on Yom Kippur, they sent them a whole load of ground to air missiles, and on other anniversaries had surprised them with a traditional carriage clock – attached by wires to 300 pounds of high-grade acetone peroxide and nitro-glycerine.

‘The reason we didn’t get them anything this year is because we have been saving up for something really special’ said Syria. ‘We’ve got our eyes on some lovely plutonium rods, and we’re hoping that next year’s anniversary will go off with a real bang.’

Lady Lobster

Posted: May 14th, 2008 by NewsBiscuit