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Seven years on, Bin Laden more angry about litter

On the seventh anniversary of the September 11th attacks, the terror leader Osama Bin Lader has admitted that he can’t really remember what it was that he was so angry about, and that these days he finds himself more indignant about litter, bad driving and too many commercial breaks during classic movies.

The admission comes on the date that will always be synonymous with the terror attacks that shook the world and New York’s iconic Twin Towers were destroyed by hi-jacked passenger jets. ‘I think we did it because we were really mad about American foreign policy or something,’ recalls Bin Laden in a special anniversary interview on Al Jazeera, ‘To do with the Middle East, maybe, I can’t remember now, it was all such a long time ago. Anyway it must have seemed important at the time.’

During the frank interview, an older more moderate Bin Laden admits that since reading more about it, he has come to understand that the Middle East is actually a very complex geo-political issue, with valid arguments on both sides, and that American politicians and diplomats must have a difficult time balancing the various interest groups lobbying them at home and abroad.

‘To be honest, the things that really make me mad as I get older are unnecessary road works, queue-jumping and litter. People grab themselves a fast food meal, and how much effort is it to drop the box in a litter bin or take it home with you? But no, they just throw it to the ground and leave it for more socially minded people like myself to clear up after them. Sometimes I think I might write to the council. Or maybe even start my own petition if I’m feeling particularly irritated.’

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Posted: Sep 11th, 2008 by NewsBiscuit

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