Israeli tanks occupying key positions in Gaza are displaying Baby on Board’ stickers in an effort to divert criticism from locals. There have been a number of reported incidents in which angry mobs of Palestinian youths gathered to throw stones at Israeli tanks, but stopped as soon as they noticed the baby sign.
‘When an enemy tank comes rumbling through your front garden during granny’s 90th birthday party, it can be kind of annoying,’ said one householder, ‘but as soon as I saw that the driver was a parent of an infant I completely forgave them. If they have a baby on board, then clearly they have the right to do whatever they want.’
Israeli Army boffins are believed to have experimented with several types of vehicle notices, including zany bumper stickers such as ‘Mafia Staff Car – keepa da hands off’ and ‘Kevin and Tracey’ windscreen letters. World opinion has also been mollified by providing all Israeli army vehicles with stickers saying ‘How’s my invading?’ with a hot-line number to report any armies crossing into Gaza in an over-aggressive or discourteous manner.
Meanwhile Israeli rocket launchers continued to pound Palestinian positions in Gaza, while a guerrilla war continues in the occupied territory. Gazans are feeling increasingly helpless against the new Israeli tactics. ‘We were about to let off a roadside mine’ said one Arab youth, ‘when we saw the sticker on their troop carrier. ‘Caution; Show Dogs In Transit.’ World opinion would never have stood for it.’
Stoopy de Gunt