Official WHO Swine Flu Pandemic launch ‘most spectacular yet’
The global swine Flu pandemic was officially launched in Sydney today by the World Health Organisation to an estimated global audience of 3 billion. Critics hailed the spectacular as ‘the most impressive pandemic launch yet’, by general consent eclipsing the event at the Bird Flu stadium in Beijing two years ago.
A capacity crowd – keen to ‘work from home’ for a couple of weeks – packed out the new H1N1 Stadium in Sydney to watch the event. A poorly athlete staggered up to the centre of the stadium with the ‘flame of ill-health’, carried from Mexico City, before extinguishing it with an impressive sneeze. Teams of consultants and medics representing every nation trooped out onto the pitch to receive the virus, creating a beautiful sea of grubby off-white for spectators. As Margaret Chan of the WHO mounted the podium to officially declare the start of the 2009 pandemic, a sea of green and yellow fireworks filled the sky above the stadium. Following this, Bjork gave a rousing performance of musical hacks, snuffles and oinks, dressed in a voluminous white handkerchief.
‘This is of huge symbolic importance’ claimed Margaret Chang, defending the building of the multi-billion pound stadium with Burmese child labour ‘nations may be divided by ideology, religion and long-running historical feuds, but I believe we can all unite around the universal creed of the WHO: ‘One World, one people, one nation under the weather.’Click to send this story to a friend
Posted: Jun 13th, 2009 by C3P0
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