NewsBiscuit

Following a 30 percent increase in domestic accidents, the British Standards Institute has recruited 1000 Standard British Idiots (SBIs) to perform safety tests on a range of appliances.  A spokesperson explained: ‘For years we have worked on the assumption that nobody in their right mind would stick a spoon into a live socket, but they do.  We have recruited this calibre of person: someone who will look for a gas leak with a match, or set off across the channel on a lilo.’

‘Giving these idiots access to electrical goods will tell us just exactly what kind of accidents we need to guard against – using your laptop in the bath for example.’  The BSI is getting through testers at an alarming rate and is looking for more volunteers; drinkers who urinate onto live electrical tube lines and BNP voters are especially welcome.

Posted: Jun 15th, 2009 by testaclese the tautologist