Jackson effect turns pop chart into ‘Topped 40′

With all top places now occupied by dead people, the music industry chart has been dubbed the ‘Topped 40′. ‘Corpsing was always considered bad luck in the entertainment industry’ quipped a top music executive. ‘But nobody told Michael Jackson. Ever the rebel, he’s stood tradition on its head. Never has mortis been so de rigour.

Now Jackson has been joined in the charts by a haunting chorus of his cadaverous friends. ‘It don’t matter if you’re black, white or turning green, as long as you’re decomposing.’ Ageing rock stars hoping to turn around years of declining record sales are being advised by their accountants to try dying.

The Big Bopper, George Formby, Liberace and Benny Hill were among those enjoying sufficient ‘grateful dead’ sales to see them back in the ‘Stiff Parade’.

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Posted: Jul 14th, 2009 by

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