Scottish pensioner Edinburgh, known as Edina to her friends, today admitted her regret at ever agreeing to have a tattoo.
‘I was young and impressionable,’ she said, ‘and when this group of manly soldiers suggested I had one to please them, I thought why not?’ Edina says she was intoxicated by heady thoughts of rebellion and making herself attractive to those red blooded fighters.
‘I had the first tattoo in a back street near the castle,’ said Edina. ‘It was quite small, fairly tasteful and not really painful at all. But every year more of these guys would come along and persuade me to do it again and make it bigger, and before you know it I was left with this monstrosity that will never go away,’ said Edinburgh, who would have been shame-faced if her fringe hadn’t grown so huge as to obsucure everything else.