Terrorism attempt fails as suicide bomber forgets to put explosives timer clock back

Ahmed Amenz, a member of a Taliban insurgency cell, was left bemoaning his forgetfulness after a meticulously planned attack that was expected to see him create carnage in a Kabul market place, failed when the distracted father of three forgot to re-set the clock on the timer located on his homemade incendiary device.

Instead of wreaking havoc in a busy public meeting place, Amenz’s homemade explosives belt went off just before he left the house. At the time of detonation the absent-minded Jihadi was watching a satellite broadcast of the Jeremy Kyle show, and is now said to be spending the afterlife contesting paternity cases with 72 ‘right old slappers’.

Edward Hack

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