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Childhood friends locked in custody battle over old memory

kudos of having once pissed on a policeman increases with ageBrian Nayar and Mark Bridle, once the greatest of friends have now become the fiercest of enemies after a series of disagreements over a shared memory from their formative teenage years in which one of them apparently urinated out of an upstairs window onto the head of a police officer below. After failing to come to an agreement over which one of them was the urinator and which one was talking to the policeman at the time they both feel they have reached an impasse where only astute legal minds can make the decision for them.

Mr Bridle is adamant that he was the one excreting in the story and that he dined out on the tale for many years sometimes even with his best friend at his side relaying his part in answering the door to the unfortunate lawman but then a few months ago they were at a house party when he overheard Mr Nayar tell the story with himself as the leak taker; ‘I stood there aghast barely able to contain my disappointment but felt compelled to correct my erstwhile friend. For some reason he mistook my veracity as masked hostility and bellowed at me that I was the one who answered the door to the policeman while he delivered the liquid payload from above. After three months of protracted discussions the only course of action left to me is a legal one and I will have my day in court, nobody is going to call me a liar and get away with it’.

Mr Nayar is less vocal but certainly as aggrieved ‘I remember the incident well and although I was the principal mischief maker I was quite happy to let Mark take the credit at first, sitting quietly by chuckling to myself but he wouldn’t stop telling it, over the years I’ve heard it at BBQ’s, weddings, christenings and birthday parties, the last straw came when somebody else actually told the story to me. I’ve been his straight man for twenty years but no more, by the time I’m finished with him he’ll not only have to depict me in my true role but pay me royalties whenever he tells the bloody story.’

The only witness to the incident PC Ian Ball was unable to recollect any details of the night in question ‘I visited a number of properties that evening so I’m afraid I have no idea who answered the door to me, I do remember the weather was particularly bad though and it rained quite heavily at one point’.

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Posted: Dec 8th, 2009 by Rizzo

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