Brian Atkins, a 45 year-old telecommunications enginner from Watford, today shocked the internet community by announcing that his ham and pineapple pizza with a garlic bread accompanyment had been delivered to him successfully by Luigi’s Pizza and Kebabs, also from Watford.
Internet pioneer Tim Berners-Lee wept uncontrollably as he described how his idea to develop a global communications network has at last delivered the results he has waited-for for so long ‘I can’t believe it’ said Berners-Lee ‘At first I hoped that the network would be used to help scientific advances and to speed-up the development of cancer cures through the global sharing of information, but when I heard that Brian’s pizza and garlic bread had arrived safely I was just overwhelmed.’
Twitter addicts were also buoyed by Atkins’s announcement ‘It’s fantastic news’ said Twitter CEO Evan Williams ‘Although having examined his tweets for the past two days I’m concerned that he’s only had one crap, and I hope the pizza doesn’t add to his digestive congestion.’
When interviewed Atkins said that in his haste to announce the safe delivery of his pizza through Twitter he had neglected to tip the delivery driver but said that ‘It didn’t really matter, in fact my pizza was also topped with a free bonus from Luigi’s, which I think was a kind of guacamole but only a bit more slimy and full of bubbles. The guy who delivered it also had a really bad cold, but that didn’t stop him offering first class customer service.’
‘Ideally I would have liked to announce that the free diet coke had also arrived successfully, but I ran out of characters. Still that’s the price you have to pay for being an early adopter of advanced technologies’ said Atkins.
15th January 2010