Travel chaos as God closes sky over Easter weekend

Holidaymakers were faced with more chaos last night with the news that God intends to close European airspace over the Easter weekend for ‘an ongoing programme of essential maintenance work to upgrade the sky.’

A spokeswoman for BA said: ‘There is nothing we can do about Acts of God. He refused to come to the negotiating table to thrash out a settlement. It would be easier if he could schedule the maintenance for when we’re all on strike.’

‘It’s a health and safety nightmare,’ thundered the Lord. ‘We’re 200 years behind on our maintenance schedule as it is. If we don’t replace the filters, the hole in the ozone layer is only going to get worse. And you don’t think all those planes stay up by themselves, do you?’

God also confirmed rumours that he has been consulting colour charts at his local Homebase. ‘Whilst we’re doing all that work, I’m wondering if I should change the colour after all these years. Sky Blue is so obvious. I’ve always rather fancied Soft Damson, or maybe Satin Blush would be a nice change. Perhaps I’d better check with ‘er upstairs.’

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Posted: Mar 26th, 2010 by

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