The owner of an east London corner shop has admitted it may have been a mistake to stock up on extra supplies of ‘get well soon’ cards following the attack on Ian Huntley in his prison cell.
Posted: Mar 24th, 2010
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Consumer groups have reacted furiously to a leaked Treasury email suggesting that Alistair Darling will include a windfall tax on déjà vu in his Budget today, in a move designed to raise £3.5 billion without alienating younger voters. ‘The sight of Hoon, Hewitt and Byers promising access for cash has led to a huge rise [...]
Posted: Mar 24th, 2010
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The English National Opera and its counterparts in great cities across the world will all shut their doors for the last time over the course of the next six months. According to industry insiders, this has been caused by the growing consensus that opera is actually unmitigated rubbish that has no chance of ever becoming popular.
‘In retrospect, I’m amazed we got away with it for so long,’ admitted John Berry, artistic director at the ENO.
Posted: Mar 23rd, 2010
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A London office worker has broken down under the relentless questioning of staff at fast food outlet Subway, confessing her most intimate personal secrets, as well as her preference for a six-inch ham sub.
Posted: Mar 23rd, 2010
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Pope Benedict XVI has announced plans for all Roman Catholic clergy to be fitted with a special ‘panic button’ that will allow users to report suspected paedophiles.
Posted: Mar 23rd, 2010
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