David Cameron is to attempt a unique election double by trying to get himself voted in as the best person to play ‘Dorothy’ in The Wizard of Oz at the same time as aiming to win the British General Election.
‘The other candidates are simply not offering the chance to mend our broken society’ he said of all the young hopefuls currently vying to play the musical lead made famous by Judy Garland. ‘Neither Danielle, Jenny or Stephanie are prepared to make the tough choices required as we face the difficult, yellow brick road ahead.’
Some political commentators fear that the double challenge of an election campaign and a TV talent show may prove too much for the Conservative leader, who already showed signs of confusion at PMQs when he asked the Prime Minister ‘If happy little bluebirds fly, beyond the rainbow, why oh why can’t I?’
A reasonable first musical performance of ‘We’re off to see the Wizard’ was undermined by him interrupting the other hopefuls. Sophie Evans from Wales said ‘It was awful. I was in the middle of my big solo and he kept saying ‘Will you reverse the National Insurance increases?’ I thought maybe he was a backing singer or something, but he just kept on and on.’ ‘He would be a controversial choice as Dorothy’ said TV judge Andrew Lloyd Webber. ‘But the land of Oz can’t go on like this. I’ve never voted Conservative before, but – oh who am I kidding, I’ve always voted Tory – I’m really, really rich, what do you expect?’
David Cameron returned to campaigning yesterday afternoon, under the slogan ‘There’s no place like home’. But there were concerns that the Conservative leader may have misremembered the original role when he was seen releasing his shadow cabinet team from the Tory battle bus with the words ‘Fly, my pretties fly!’