Social networking giant Facebook today agreed to install a ‘totally tedious friend’ alert box on every user’s profile.
This follows a high-level meeting with several middle-aged aunts and a schoolfriend with psoriasis.
‘Many of our members are in constant danger of predatory aquaintances inflicting long-term tedium on them, said a spokesperson for Facebook, who is ‘wondering who invented builders’.
‘Innocent users who just want to find out whether old Johnny Williams has finally come out end up reading update after update of drivelling nonsense about his management consultancy. The environment just isn’t safe anymore.’