Scientists meeting in London for a World summit on extra-terrestrial life have confirmed that there is now no hope of intelligent life being discovered in the Universe after Britain’s Got Talent was broadcast into space.
Worried scientists have proved that advanced alien civilisations will now be aware of the pointless banal drudgery that is human civilisation, and will therefore conceal all signs of intelligent life from us.
‘We’re pretty sure the Galaxy is teeming with life,’ said the president of the Royal Society. ‘But quite frankly, we’re now sure they’re simply hiding from us after we’ve been stupid enough to let them see this banal pap.’
Simon Cowell was unavailable for comment.