‘The wheel was a crucial part of the coalition agreement,’ said Mr Cameron, ‘and it is great to think that while I am up at the dispatch box dealing with important matters of state, Nick can sit behind me with his steering wheel and still feel part of the action.’
Mr Clegg is understood to be absolutely delighted with his new wheel, which he can use to turn left and turn right in accordance with prevailing government policy. ‘It gives me a real sense of power,’ said an excited Mr Clegg, ‘and it even has a little horn which I can honk, but only if Dave says it is safe to do so.’
The original inspiration for the wheel came from the popular TV show, The Simpsons. ‘As soon as Nick saw that baby Maggie had a steering wheel, he wanted one too,’ said a Downing Street source. ‘We even managed to find him a nice yellow one to match his tie.’
‘The steering wheel is a clear sign that Nick is influencing government policy,’ said Liberal Democrat Simon Hughes. ‘When I look across at the government benches and see the wheel come out, I know that we are really making a difference.’
Other Liberal Democrat cabinet members have also been issued with their own tiny toys. Chief Secretary to the Treasury Danny Alexander has a Fisher Price shop till, Energy Secretary Chris Huhne plays with a Lego wind farm, while Business Secretary Vince Cable regularly sits in a Wendy House rocking backwards and forwards with his head in his hands.
Nick Clegg will unveil his new steering wheel at the next Prime Minister’s Questions. ‘This government is all about giving power back to the people,’ said Mr Clegg, ‘I want everyone in Britain to feel the same sense of power as I do when I honk my little horn.’