Coke addict not bothered by election of new Colombian president

Jono Greggs, advertising executive and habitual cocaine user, last night greeted the news of the victory of Colombia’s ex-defence chief Santos in the presidential election with an indifferent shrug. ‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘It must suck to have a killer as a president, but it’s Colombia – what d’you expect?’

He immediately launched into a long story about a crazy coke dealer he once met on the Italy-Switzerland border crossing. Later that night in a more contemplative moment Mr Greggs admitted that, yes, he could see that in theory his money did go to Colombian paramilitaries who, in collaboration with Santos’ soldiers, and under the cover of fighting left wing guerillas, had carried out extra-judicial killings. Then he took another line and said, ‘Jesus, have you tried this stuff? My face is frozen solid! Sorry, what were saying? Did I tell you what I did last week? Man it was crazy!’

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Posted: Jun 23rd, 2010 by

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