An undergraduate who mistook his university’s library for a bar is being offered counselling to help him recover from the trauma.
‘I’d had a few jars and this and that and must have got a bit disorientated,’ explained geography student Bill Wilkinson ‘I pushed open this door expecting to see me mates and a line of Foster’s waiting for me. Instead there was this dead quiet room full of shelves of books with just a few elderly folk reading and writing. At first I thought I’d died and was in Hell.’ Wilkinson added that when he asked where he was, he was told to be quiet or leave the library by the ‘terrifying old geezers’, later revealed to be mature students in their late 30s.
University Tutor Dr Sheila Taylor played down the incident and assured the public that this sort of incident was not typical of a modern academic environment. ‘The university authorities will be installing better signage so that other students do not suffer Bill’s scary and traumatic experience,’ she said, ‘Young Bill is still in shock but don’t worry we have extended indefinitely the deadline for this term’s Googled essay.’