London’s homeless sector got a huge boost today with Boris Johnson’s announcement of funding for free dogs and training to improve the forlorn looks modelled by the city’s tramps.
‘It’s fantastic news that the Mayor has stepped up and promised us some real change,’ said Paul who frequents the bus shelters of the West End. ‘The credit crunch has hit everybody, but what with the influx of new talent from the banking sector, the industry just hasn’t been able to keep pace and our livelihoods are at risk. Some of these poor newcomers still have clean shirts and cufflinks – it knocks the investors’ trust to see people like this.’
Under the Mayor’s plans funding for the homeless would be overseen by the newly-formed Tramps for London quango, but sadly they spent all the money on booze.