The Provisional RSPCA has accepted responsibility for its latest act in a long running suburban terror campaign. The paramilitary animal rights army, thought to be more powerful than ever, has pledged to back more outrages by the gang known as the Grey Squirrels.
Britain’s police force has admitted it is powerless to stop the Provisional RSPCA and in some cases even aids the terror group as it hauls ‘suspects’ in for extraordinary renditions. ‘For every one drowned squirrel, expect us to ruin ten lives,’ said a spokes-rodent.
Tension between Britain’s two communities – the Reds and the Greys – has been simmering for years. With backing from the Provisional RSPCA, the greys increasingly see themselves as untouchable. ‘We’ve got the red squirrels licked,’ its website boasts.