Middle-aged Reigate man sends message of support to troubled Blair

46-year-old Alan Watkins, an accountant from Reigate, has sent a message of sympathy to Tony Blair after the former prime minister went public with a raft of personal difficulties.

“It was the least I could do,” said Watkins, who wanted to let the troubled Mr Blair know that others had been through the problems he had admitted to in his memoir A Journey, published yesterday. “I, too, don’t get on with a close colleague at work – that bitch Heather Williams has had her eye on my 250-sheet stapler for months now but she’s not getting it.” Watkins also revealed that he has been using “not excessively excessive” quantities of alcohol to get him through the day, “sometimes as much as two glasses of white wine after dinner”.

“Of course, I don’t pretend to share all his problems,” Watkins said. “I can’t say that I misled Parliament about the legality of a war I helped to trigger, for instance, or that thousands of people lost their lives because of my manic belief that weapons of mass destruction existed despite no supporting evidence. But my wife is also a bossy cow and I can’t decide when to quit my job either, so I really do share his pain.”

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