NewsBiscuit

The news before it happens…

Archive for September, 2010

Blockbuster’s application for bankruptcy pending further proof of ID

‘We usually ask for at least three forms of ID,’ said a spokeswoman for the US Department of Commerce.

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Posted: Sep 23rd, 2010
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Lib Dem conference votes to make Charles Kennedy the designated driver

‘When I broke the news to Charles his face flushed with pride and his hands shook with excitement.’

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Posted: Sep 23rd, 2010
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Diners’ fury at ‘only order what you can pronounce’ legislation

'I'll have a 'for ti too', please'Food-lovers across Britain are downing their cutlery in protest today, after the passing of a controversial new law banning all restaurants from serving any dish that the customer cannot pronounce correctly.

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Posted: Sep 22nd, 2010
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Call for proper pet labelling after unfortunate tortoise drowning incident

‘I think I gave the game away when I asked if tortoises could swim. How was I supposed to know?”

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Posted: Sep 22nd, 2010
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‘Whitehall Chainsaw Massacre’ lacks sufficient fake blood, say horror fans

‘All we ask is that when the postal service dies, there is the cathartic release of a spectacular blood fountain.’

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Posted: Sep 22nd, 2010
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