While civil servants are not needed because there will no longer be public services and small loans advisors are not needed because not even God can get a loan, prophets of doom are reportedly finding themselves out of work in the face of overwhelming doom in the present.
‘There’s very little point in predicting doom in the future any more,’ explained Jack ‘Farsight’ Whitley of Reading as he filled out the 50-page JSA form at his Jobcentre. ‘What with recessions, wars, global warming, natural disasters and what-have-you, the end isn’t nigh, it’s bloody well here.’
Mr Whitley is unsure what type of jobs he will find in today’s difficult job market. ‘And look at this sodding form – it doesn’t even have the right boxes to describe my old job. What did you achieve in your last position? Well I was bloody right wasn’t I?’