Undercover Telegraph reporters posing as churchgoers have been able to record statements by clergymen lending weight to the rumour that the Pope is in fact a Catholic.
Junior reporters first focused their attention on Catholic priests in confessionals, posing as regular sinners. After half an hour of deliberately fawning and unchallenging questions, the giggling journalist casually dropped the bombshell that she had heard several members of the community suggest that the Pope is in fact a Catholic.
And her clandestine recording clearly confirms the priest’s shocking answer: “Well, you seem to have hit the nail on the head there, young lady”.
The Telegraph was quick to congratulate itself on another scoop, with a spokesman promising that readers would be gripped by next week’s expose on the toilet habits of wild bears.