Hard-up criminals forced to moonlight says report

Criminals are taking second jobs to make ends meet according to Crime Scene the trade magazine for the legally challenged.

‘It’s the downturn,’ said ‘Mad’ Mick Moran (burglar and the magazine’s editor). ‘There’s just isn’t the good stuff for the taking in people’s homes.’

One drug dealer is moonlighting as a fireman.

‘Actually’, said Phil ‘The Hammer’ Jones (hoodlum and criminologist), ‘it’s difficult to decide which involves the most dishonesty – banking or burglary, politics or poncing.’

‘This is placing a terrible strain on a villain’s family ,’ said Sir Paul ‘Fingers’ Stephenson (petty thief and Commissioner of the Metropolitan Police).

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Posted: Jan 9th, 2011 by

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