Two thousand years after being prophesied, it has now been officially confirmed that the Meek have inherited the Earth.
‘Well, this is a bit of a surprise,’ said Raymond Muldowney, a mild-mannered deputy bank manager from the Isle of Wight. ‘Apparently I’m in charge of all precious metal deposits in southern Africa now!’
Muldowney admitted that he is more at ease with handing out hymn books than paying off local militias, and is struggling with middle management appointments, given that it is woe unto the rich, the strong, the Pharisees and anyone else who ever had anything to do with organising things.
‘I hate to make a fuss,’ he said. ‘I asked those who hunger and thirst after righteousness, but they’ve been filled and are sleeping it off, and the pure in heart are just wandering around in a bit of daydream after getting the Kingdom of Heaven. Perhaps my wife could ask some of her friends at the bridge club?’