Osborne to tax pocket money

In a new bid to reduce the deficit George Osborne today unveiled plans to tax pocket money.

A starting rate of 2% on £2 per week will increase to 10% for amounts up to ten pounds. Pampered brats receiving more than that per week will be taxed at the full 50% higer-earners rate.

Mr Osborne stated: ‘it’s time children started contributing to the state. From now on, pedal cars will require Road Tax discs, and tree houses and Wendy houses classed as second homes.’

When asked how the tax will be collected Mr Osborne replied: ‘bullies have been collecting lunch money of years. We shall use this resource to recover the new taxes. In return, the bullies will have their ASBOs, detentions and Community Payback Orders reduced accordingly.’

Rumours of bankers’ children being taxed at punitive levels were dismissed as ‘wishful thinking.’

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Posted: Mar 31st, 2011 by

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