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Footballer to sue ‘water-cooler’ company

Lawyers for a premiership footballer have been instructed to sue the owners of ‘Aqua-Chill’, a leading office water supplier for the Luton area, as the placement of water-coolers encourages malicious gossip and ill-informed innuendo.

The footballer’s solicitor said that his client ‘is sickened by the thought that every Monday break time, office workers are gathering around to sip from tiny cones of water and discuss his personal humpings. Not only is this an invasion of privacy but it is a blatant attempt by water-cooling companies to boost their profits on the back of my client’s suffering’.

Aqua-Chill said they would defend themselves rigorously, but communications expert Jim Parfitt said he supported the star’s legal action, arguing ‘it’s only right that if the restrictions apply to more traditional forms of refreshment such as coffee-machines and kettles they should apply to water-coolers as well.’

Milo Shame

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Posted: May 23rd, 2011 by Guest

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