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Arctic Roll granted EU geographical protected food status

Against the wishes of its manufacturer, Arctic Rolls were granted protection under the EU ‘regional food’ policy yesterday. From July, the retro dessert can only be labelled ‘Arctic Roll’ if it is manufactured within the Arctic circle.

‘We will challenge this ruling’ complained a spokesman for Birds Eye, ‘but in the meantime, we’re trying to find out if any of the Inuit tribes have experience of making jammy sponge ice-cream desserts. We’re hoping maybe some of the tribesmen who make Baked Alaska might do it.’

The ruling is the latest in a string of ‘tit for tat’ applications by companies keen to undermine their competitors. Cadbury’s were the first to bring the issue in front of the EU, by applying for protection for Mars Bars and Milky Way. Mars have drawn up emergency plans for a rebranding of Mars Bars to Slough Chows. However, research using a GCSE book on astronomy showed that the Milky Way snack is already technically compliant.

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Posted: May 27th, 2011 by waylandsmithy

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