David Cameron has announced that police will be issued with super soaker water pistols as an extra weapon in their public order armoury.
‘Heavy anti-riot artillery, such as the water cannon, is a blunt sword,’ said the Prime Minister. ‘Such a weapon is important, but is useless without individual policemen being able to engage on a more localised level. So we have authorised the micro-artillery of the super soaker anti-riot personal attack weapon, a device of proven effectiveness and surgical precision.’
Police have welcomed the announcement; a spokesman for The Association of Chief Police Officers said: ‘We have been asking for these garishly coloured high pressure water dispensers for some time. We are sure that those involved in looting, riot, and violence will think again if faced with the prospect of getting a humiliating soaking,’ adding, ‘it will help the fire brigade in extinguishing the fires too.’