Coalition to put Nick Clegg up for adoption

On the day the coalition have decided to look at shortening the adoption process, they have also announced they are putting Nick Clegg on the adoption list. The move comes as Conservative and Liberal Democrats argue over who shall have custody of Mr Clegg over the festive period.

In a statement released by the Lib Dems, they explained that since David Cameron had fostered Mr Clegg as part of the coalition agreement, he has become a different person. ‘If we take him back, it will take years to get ‘our’ Nick back. We asked him who he loved the most, he said that the Tories were his favourite parent.’

But despite the apparently cosy relationship with the Mr Clegg, the Conservative party has also moved to distance themselves from being his legal guardian. ‘We may have brought him a backbone for Christmas, but that is only because we have some more controversial legislation to get though in the new year’ a spokesman from their Millbank Headquarters told us. ‘But the last thing we want is to be responsible for him. We only have him because the Lib Dems elected him leader in the first place. We cannot be held responsible for their mistakes.’

Meanwhile Nick Clegg himself has run away and plans to come forward as soon as there are desperate appeals for him on the news.   No plans for any appeals have been made so far.


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Posted: Dec 23rd, 2011 by

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