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Archive for December, 2011

Christmas Day 2011 ‘busiest day in history’ for internet

Retailers up and down the internet have reported a busy Christmas Day as people looked for another way to avoid prolonged contact with loved ones. It is thought that in the modern world of ever decreasing attention spans, most people can tolerate 1 hour 30 minutes of interaction with humans before needing to check Facebook and Twitter, and spend money they haven’t got online.

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Posted: Dec 26th, 2011
More from News In Brief



Shepherds complain after missing out in Bethlehem Secret Santa draw yet again

'Glad tidings my arse!'‘All we are asking for is a fair draw for the presents,’ continued the shepherd. ‘It’s the same story every year. We wrap up a lamb, struggle down the green hillside to visit the baby and stick our secret Santa present under the manger. But invariably we end up leaving with nothing other than some cow crap on our Jesus sandals.’

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Posted: Dec 25th, 2011
More from World News



Divorcing couple play football on Christmas Day

will all kick off again on Boxing DayJoe and Paula Western decided to set aside their differences on Christmas day and play a game of football in no-mans land, the area between the house and the garden shed where Joe now sleeps.

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Posted: Dec 24th, 2011
More from Features



Eastender to spend quiet Christmas with family

'leave it Santa, it ain't worth it'It is alleged a character in the popular soap is to enjoy a quiet Christmas devoid of the usual abject misery.

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Posted: Dec 23rd, 2011
More from Arts/Entertainment



Lloyds TSB to sell 85% of Julie Walters to the treasury

Much-loved actress and comedian Julie Walters, for eight years the voice of Lloyds TSB, is to become, literally, a national treasure. Almost. The ailing bank has been forced to sell an 85% in the Smethwick-born artiste to HM Government, making her the first actress to undergo near-total nationalisation. She is currently valued at £9.73 million.

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Posted: Dec 23rd, 2011
More from News In Brief