Christianity may soon be a thing of the past say researchers at Oxford University. ‘We may have found a cure for the condition,’ said Professor James Cross of Exeter College. ‘It could soon be as rare as polio.’
Professor Cross said that bombarding sufferers with large doses of rationality and common sense gradually restored them to full health. ‘They stopped falling on their knees, crossing themselves, talking to themselves with their eyes closed, and generally stopped talking complete bollocks to anyone who would listen about the origin of the universe and anything else under the sun you care to mention,’ Professor Cross said, adding that side effects include heightened sexual activity.
But Professor Cross admitted the cure was less successful ‘the further gone’ the patient. ‘We don’t hold out much hope for the Pope or the Archbishop of Canterbury who are at what we call the terminal stage,’ he said. ‘All they can do is pray another cure comes along.’