Budget airline Ryanair has announced it is soon to begin ‘dam buster’ flights to all its major destinations – starting with Germany.
Explaining to reporters the airline’s ‘groundbreaking dam buster concept’, Ryanair’s CEO Michael O’Leary said:
‘We shall be employing in our aircraft the advanced technology used by the Dam Busters. We are ceasing to operate aircraft with fancy autopilots and the like.
‘That is, we’re tearing out of our fleet all the expensive computerised navigational nonsense and replacing it with dam buster technology – coat hangers lashed together and a couple of flashlights. What was good enough for war heroes, is good enough for our punters.’
Mr O’Leary admitted that Ryanair pilots had little experience of ‘dropping stuff in the sea’, except the ‘contents of our aircraft lavatories which, oddly enough, sometimes bounce’.
‘It’s just a pilot scheme,’ he added.
Ryanair pilots are said to be demanding a special hearty breakfast before they embark on dam buster flights.