Derek Acorah and ‘spirit guide’ split because of ‘artistic differences’

'Is there a Derek here tonight? Anyone? No?'

Television medium, Derek Acorah and his ‘spirit guide’ Sam have announced they are to split. They have cited their ‘artistic differences’ as the main reason, with Sam becoming ever more disillusioned with the vague nature of Derek’s readings.

In an interview via Ouija Board, Sam told reporters ‘the level of detail I used to give Derek would have been enough identify even the most bland looking of people, but so he could string out a reading, and his £120 per hour fee, he would give the bare minimum. At our last reading together, I told him about a 76 year old lady called Mrs Hume-Winslow, that used to work as a horse trainer, and died of pneumonia. She had three kids, the eldest of which was in prison for fraud. All he asked the 2,000 strong audience was ’Does anybody know a Mary’. I mean, why do I bother?’

Although the nature of Derek’s readings has been put forward as the reason for the split, Sam has also complained he was treated like a slave. ‘He takes all the credit, but I do all the work, even penning his first book’ he complained. ‘The pressure that put on me drove me to drink. It was the first book to be ghost written by an alcoholic spirit.’

Speculation over Mr Acorah’s future has already begun, with predictions ranging from him not being able to connect the living with the deceased, to him not being able to see any film with Bruce Willis. He has said he was disappointed by the sudden decision of his former spirit guide and denied some reports this is just a publicity stunt. ‘He has made me look silly and potentially taken away my livelihood’ he told us. ‘Why would I want to get back with him? He’s dead to me.’

Mr Acorah has also reacted angrily to criticism that he should really have seen it coming. ‘How could I have known what Sam was thinking’ he snapped. ‘I’m not bloody psychic!’

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Posted: Mar 24th, 2012 by

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