James Bond pulled from Olympics promo as ‘license to kill’ found to have expired

Red-faced London 2012 officials have withdrawn James Bond from an Olympics promotional event at Buckingham Palace after revelations that his ‘license to kill’ expired in 1995, meaning he has technically committed 384 murders in the intervening period.

It seems the mistake occurred after Bond tore up his licence following a ‘sexist, misogynist dinosaur’ jibe from the newly-appointed ‘M’. While things were soon patched up, it appears the new unsigned licence became mixed up in a 183-page expense claim submitted by the secret agent.

London 2012 officials have, however, been eager to clarify that this turn of events doesn’t constitute a ‘blanket ban’ on mass-murderers visiting the games. ‘Genocidal heads of state from oil-rich countries will, of course, still be welcome.’ said a spokesperson.


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Posted: Apr 4th, 2012 by

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