Small-sized left-of-centre broadsheet The Independent has scored a victory in its long-running campaign to outlaw cock fights in the United Kingdom (excepting Guernsey).
‘We are glad to report that the Government has finally sat up and paid attention to our constant banging-on.’ declared Independent editor Chris Blackhurst. ‘We have been assured that any documented incidents of cock fighting will face the full severity of the law’
The victory follows hot on the heels of the paper’s ‘Say no to badger baiting,’ and ‘End child chimneysweep scandal now!’ campaigns.
‘This is another triumph for our incredibly-worthy-but-also-slightly-dull style of campaigning’ exclaimed Blackhurst. ‘And for once we have been rewarded for our high-minded carping: every time we mentioned ‘cock fighting’ on our front page circulation went up. ‘Go figure’ as those imperialist aggressors the Americans would say.’