Belgium will not compete in the 2012 Olympics because of a sore throat, according to an announcement made this morning. It’s understood Belgium’s mother wrote the note at the request of the Benelux country. Locog released the full text:
‘Dear Mr Coe,
Please let Belgium off of the Olympics this time round due to a sore throat and a bit of a cold. Hes got a Drs appointment. Also he hasnt felt well generally and that business over the showers hasnt helped frankly. I hope Belgium will be OK to compete in the European Games in 2016 but we’ll have to see how things go.’
Olympic officials and a team of forensic scientists are examining the note, to establish its authenticity. Lord Coe told a press conference yesterday that he was “disappointed” with the news, and denied it was related to an incident where he allegedly ordered the small European country do ten press ups in front of the European Union “and then done a cruel laugh”. Belgium’s mother was unavailable for comment.
Meanwhile the Brazilian team, having looked at catering provision at its training facilities has asked ‘to go packed lunch.’