A maths teacher who has been at the centre of a Europe-wide manhunt following his alleged elopement with a young, female pupil has issued a statement indicating that there has been absolutely no illegal or untoward behaviour on his part whatsoever and that he was simply wrongly directed by his new Apple Maps software.
“I was just leaving the pupil home to her house which I have never been to before and certainly have never been to when her parents have been out for the evening” says the statement. “I put the address into the Maps sat-nav system and started driving. The next thing I knew, I was boarding a ferry and heading for France. I just kept following the Maps directions and now I don’t know where we are.”
The Church of England school from which they eloped has issued a fresh warning to its staff to ensure that they don’t get led astray by a young lady and an Apple as ‘that has caused all sorts of problems in the past.’