1970s television personality and current mainstay in the Eastbourne theatre circuit Ian Krankie has been arrested by police after having been discovered to have had intimate relations with long-term comedy partner Wee Jimmy Krankie.
The police were first alerted after he was sighted kissing the boy backstage after the show. ‘I just couldn’t believe my eyes’ said witness Gladys Winslow. ‘They were hugging and kissing while congratulating each other on their performance. They didn’t even stop when they saw us. He’s obviously a paedophile, so we rang the police straight away.’
Police have reported that Ian Krankie was quickly arrested and Jimmy has been taken into emergency foster care, although not without a struggle. ‘When we tried to remove him and place him with foster parents, Jimmy kept protesting by telling us the ridiculous story that ‘he’ is in fact a ‘she’ named Janette who is actually not much younger than ‘Ian’ and is also married to him’ reported a police spokesman.